


Distance (Space Integral)

by ohjustdisarmalready



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: F/M, Gen, Murder, adopting your local semiferal gay wizard and other extreme sports, meetings & negotiations, what if taako took the chalice au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-03
Updated: 2018-02-14
Packaged: 2019-01-08 09:41:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12251799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohjustdisarmalready/pseuds/ohjustdisarmalready
Summary: Magnus and Julia fight the last battle for Raven's Roost over Governor Kalen's desk. Taako kills a man. Stephen the goldfish is my favorite character.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This all got written in class over like two weeks as I resisted paying attention to the lecture. I've actually got this AU plotted out to the Rockport Limited arc, but I'm not sure if I'll add to this or leave it as a oneshot. This is after Taako has had the chalice for a while, this is his sixth time going through the timeline, but only his second run through where he's involved in the Raven's Roost Rebellion.

“What’s crack-a-lackin’, homie?” Asked a wizard that shouldn’t even be here.

“Taako. How did you know about this meeting? Not even Stephen knows we’re here right now,” Magnus hissed, eyeing the guards who were ignoring them on either side of the door ahead. Julia stood warily between him and them, hand on her handaxes and attention on the potential threat. She was letting him handle the Taako situation.

“Eh, whispers on the wind. I had to work my ass off to get anyone a meeting at all, but Kalen doesn’t want to see me. So I’m coming with you.” Taako flipped his wand through the air and shrugged loosely. Magnus remembered the corpses of two dozen soldiers covered in feathers and thought he wasn’t surprised that Kalen had declined a one-on-one with the wizard.

Still, Taako had been a good friend and his quick ruthlessness had, in its own way, made the rebellion smoother. Certainly he’d saved Magnus and Julia a couple times, and that alone made him family in Magnus’s book. It couldn’t be so bad to allow him to see the rebellion to its end. Magnus settled on a shrug.

“Yeah, come on in with us. We’re negotiating a peace, so it’ll be good to have an outside witness,” he said, and paused. “Not that—I’m not saying you’re not one of us. You’ve earned that. You have a home here. Just, you grew up somewhere else, right, so you’d be, uh. Objective.”

Taako’s uninterested facial expression didn’t change, but his ears flipped up and stopped their disappointed drooping. Magnus didn’t know a whole lot about him personally, but he seemed like a guy who’d never had a place to belong. Dangerous as Taako could be, Magnus kind of wanted to wrap him up in a blanket and give him a home sometimes. Julia said it was his soft heart.

“Yeah, you got it. Totes objective, got no personal stake in this. I’m just here for giggles.” The guards shifted impatiently and Julia broadened her stance in response. Magnus nodded and led Taako through the door before it could get violent.

As soon as they were though, a green bubble popped up over the door. Taako didn’t seem surprised by it and Kalen jumped, so it probably wasn’t something nasty.

“Burnsides. Waxman. …Wizard.” Kalen scowled, but his hands were shaking.

“Don’t worry about me, fella. I’m just here to be a neutral party.” Taako deliberately turned his back to Kalen and began flipping through the bookshelf on the wall, frame relaxed but ears tilted back towards the conversation.

“Hmph. Neutral party.” Kalen muttered, fingers twisting together. “You have what you want, don’t you? Throwing any more troops into this would be a waste. What are you getting from this meeting?”

This was something Magnus and Julia could handle. She stepped forward and leaned over Kalen’s desk with a pretty good intimidation roll. “We want a cessation of aggression from your forces. You get out of the city and stay out. We don’t hear from you again.”

Kalen looked faintly surprised. They weren’t asking for his wealth or his life like some people would have preferred, but Magnus had insisted and Julia had allowed herself to be convinced. There was no point in revenge—ruining Kalen wouldn’t help Raven’s Roost heal.

Still, he tried to bargain. “My men and I have two months to pack and leave. We are allowed to maintain ownership of all of our city properties until we can find buyers at a fair price. Vandalism of these properties is persecuted as heavily as vandalism of any other would be. Raven’s Roost maintains trade relationships with any city I come to power in without discrimination based on my position. All charges against me from citizens of Raven’s Roost are considered satisfied and may no longer be pursued.”

Julia loomed and Magnus flexed a little to support her. “You and your troops have twenty-four hours to leave Raven’s Roost with your lives and property unharmed. Charges against you will be postponed for two years, after which the government of Raven’s Roost will consider your behavior and may relieve them. Your properties and anything you do not take with you will be liquidated and used to make repairs and assist with the running of Raven’s Roost. The city will make no attempt to follow you where you go. You leave us alone and we’ll leave you alone.”

Kalen frowned faux-sympathetically. “Twenty-four hours? I have injured men, we cannot possible take them safely in that time. Surely you wouldn’t condemn these men just for following orders on a different side of this conflict?”

He looked at them with round, earnest eyes and Magnus held back a scoff. This man didn’t care about the health of his soldiers and more than he cared about Magnus. He was about to say as much when he heard a decisive clap from behind him. Kalen flinched.

When Magnus turned around—Julia keeping an eye on Kalen, just in case—Taako had closed his book and was drifting closer, playing with some bright purple flames in his off hand. He lounged over Julia’s shoulder and his arcane fire dissipated only a moment before he flicked Kalen’s nose, getting a flinch more pronounced than the one before.  Magnus was having a hard time summoning up any sympathy.

“Wanna hurry this up, ma’am, fellas? I’m getting bored.” He casually set the book he’d been flipping through on the desk, well within Julia’s reach and just out of Kalen’s. It was an unmarked, bound leather journal that Kalen clearly recognized if the look on his face was anything to go by.

It also didn’t generate enough wind to brush against Julia’s hair, despite being fairly sizeable and not set down too gently. Nor did it make a sound as it hit the desk.  Hmm.

“R-right, you conditions are agreeable. Generous, of course. I will be out with my men within twenty-four hours. Please just—agreed.” He twitched like he wanted to grab the journal, and Julia shifted to lean directly over it.

“I want that in writing with your stamp and signature on it. We’ll wait,” she said.

Kalen looked like he wanted to protest, but one glance between Taako’s indifferent face and Julia’s glower convinced him otherwise. Magnus was starting to feel a little unnecessary as Kalen started writing.

Once the treaty had been signed, stamped, and magically sealed against interference, Magnus and Julia were finally ready for peace. Within the day, Kalen would be out, and his wounded soldiers would be cared for in a nearby hamlet on their way out. Raven’s Roost would be free again.

As they were taking their copy of the treaty and getting ready to leave, Taako waved Magnus and Julia ahead. “Homeboy and I’ve got some stuff to chat about, you two go on. I’ll be right behind you.”

Julia glanced at Magnus and he shrugged. He didn’t know anything. For all that Taako was warmest with him, the guy was still a mystery.

“Be careful,” he said. Taako could handle himself.

Julia followed his lead doubtfully. She rested a hand on Taako’s shoulder and looked at Kalen. “We’ll be just outside if you need anything.  We won’t leave here without you.”

Taako shrugged her of airily. “This could take a minute, Juju. You two go ahead and spread the good word, I’ll just have a quick chat with the gov’nah here and I’ll make it back on my own. Won’t even miss me.”

Kalen straightened some papers on his desk and sneered. “I assure you, this meeting will be _brief_. The… _wizard_ will be back with you as soon as possible.”

Taako sneered right back at him and muttered something under his breath, and Kalen shut up. Julia said, “Fine. If you aren’t back in an hour, we’ll be back to get you.”

Kalen was just the type to ambush a lone leader of the rebellion as soon as he was defeated. Leaving their friend in enemy territory like this had to be killing Julia, and it didn’t make Magnus feel great either, but Taako was the type to keep himself alive. He nodded at Taako and put a hand on Julia’s elbow for support as they left.

Once the good news had been passed on to the nearest willing messenger, Magnus and Julia went home. The fighting and guerrilla warfare for a just cause had been their area, and there were others who could take care of the administration now much better than they could. They also wanted to be somewhere Taako could find them, just in case. They kept their weapons and armor on and ready.

And sure enough, before the end of the hour, a knock sounded at the door. Sure enough, Taako had returned no worse for wear and smelling faintly like a festival.

“Kalen’s gone,” he said. “I’m alive, intact, and out of here. Seeya, Mags, Jule.”

Well that wasn’t suspicious at all. “Kalen was already leaving, Taako.”

Julia seemed to be on the same train of thought. “It would take more than an hour to pack up and get out of Raven’s Roost. A lot more, if he’s bringing everything he can carry with him.”

“Well, maybe he hasn’t _left_ so much as he’s… _departed_. He is perhaps…among the recently departed. No longer with us. Gonezo. Problem solved. You’re welcome!” Taako gained momentum as he went. He leaned against the wall and flipped his wand through the air. Flip-flip-catch. Flip-flip-catch. The smell of burnt meat took on a different context.

“You killed him,” Magnus said. He needed to hear it out loud.

“Yeah, burned that fucker right up. Didn’t even see me comin’.” Taako laughed, still jittery and high on success, and Magnus felt a little sick.

“You murdered a man in cold blood. You used a peace meeting to assassinate him. Taako, he’d already given up.” Magnus said. Julia, who had definitely wanted to kill Kalen, nonetheless supported her fiancé.

“Taaks, look. Wanting to kill Kalen I get.  He was a bastard and now he’s a dead bastard. But you get that this was a dick move, right? Burnsides and I had this whole nonviolent solution going on. Making that into a murder thing is just…kind of a douchebag thing to do? Like, what the fuck. Way to say yes.” Well, she supported him in her own way. With extra swearing. It seemed called for, given the situation and how Taako had just straight up killed a dude in cold blood.

Taako scowled. “Hey, I did you country fuckers a favor. Killed the bad guy, got out clean, now you live happily ever after. You should be celebrating! Fuck, I deserve a goddamned feast for this one!”

Magnus took two quick paces away from that whole…situation. That was just. That was a thing. That Taako said. He leaned over the kitchen table that Stephen made and admired the grain. Just Taako being Taako. Just Taako being…absolutely fucked. Bringing home dead people and pouting when they weren’t happy about the straight-up murder involved. Fuck, this was why Magnus didn’t want cats. Or wizards. Fuck.

Taako took half a step forward as if to follow him, which was just not something Magnus was into at that moment. Fuck, he still smelled like singed flesh. Gods, he had to eat at this table. Luckily, Julia stepped in.

“That wasn’t a favor. That was straight-up murder Taako, that’s something you did on your own. Don’t put that on Magnus. You did this for yourself.” She crossed her arms and Taako withdrew. He looked confused, and hurt, like a little kid wondering why their older sibling was snapping at them. Except that when his ears drooped some ash fell out of his hair. Gods, that was.

Magnus understood battle, was the thing. He killed people when he fought—hard not to, with a bigass axe. He understood hate well enough, and he couldn’t pretend some tiny, terrible part of him wasn’t glad that Kalen was gone. But he’d thought Taako understood what they were doing. They weren’t rebelling to kill people; they were rebelling to _save_ them. They were trying to rebuild their home to the beautiful city Magnus distantly remembered growing up in. They couldn’t start that on a foundation of murder and treachery. Magical assassination didn’t make a home safe, it just made people afraid. That wasn’t the home Magnus wanted to live in.

“Fine. Whatever, I can see where I’m not wanted. Try to do something nice for someone, yeesh.” Taako walked the long way around the kitchen table, gesturing emphatically. He did not actually leave.

Magnus tried and failed to massage away the headache growing in his forehead. “Taako, just-”

“No, no, I see how it is. Taako kills a guy and suddenly I’m the bad guy. You guys get to get married and have a million little ruff boi kids, and Uncle Taako gets to visit on Candlenights but don’t get too close, he might murder you. Be glad I saved a fucking spell slot for this shit,” Taako rummaged through the kitchen cabinets while he ranted and Julia came to stand beside Magnus as their kitchen was ransacked by an angry wizard. She looked caught between genuine anger and just…giggles. This was their life now. Their buddy had just killed a guy and now he was taking out all of their salt. He grabbed a runestone from his pocket and Magnus quietly brought his hand to his axe, because what the fuck. He didn’t know where this was going anymore. Julia slapped his hand.

“What? You don’t know what he’s doing,” Magnus hissed, rubbing it.

“I know you’re not thinking of axe-ing one of our best friends!” She hissed back. “At least go for the shield!”

“Right, shit,” Magnus whispered, and quietly brought his hand to his shield instead.

There was a purple glow and a sound like breaking chalk and Taako whirled back around holding…a fish.

“Here’s your fucking wedding gift. His name is Stephen and you can grate his scales for seasoning and he turns pink if your food is poisoned and he lives forever. Fuck.” And then Taako disappeared with a crack.

And then it was just Magnus, and Julia, and a floating fish made out of orange salt. When Magnus held his hand out, it tried to nibble his fingers.

It was kind of cute.

“Can he be Stephen Burnsides so we don’t mix him up with your dad?”

And Julia said, at the same time, “Babe, I think he took all of our shoes.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Julia and Taako talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter fought me all the way out but it refused to remain unwritten. It's finicky like that.

It was a couple of months before they heard from Taako again. Their wedding gazebo was getting better every day, rings had been purchased, they were ready to get married as soon as their best man even got close to Raven’s Roost. The heard about him, talk about a traveling cooking show (he’d never let them eat his cooking) that traveled by, but never any closer than Neverwinter. A courier to track him down and deliver a letter was too expensive, but they knew he’d turn up eventually.

And sure enough, their chance came. There was a craft fair in Neverwinter, big and close enough that Magnus would be able to get his woodworking mastery with a three-week trip, and Taako’s cooking show was rumored to be closer than it had ever been. Magnus could go after his mastery and keep an eye out, track Taako down between Neverwinter and Raven’s Roost and pull him back home by the ear so Julia could talk some sense into him.

It was the rainy season, so Julia would have her hands full at home—Raven’s Roost was built on a cliff and with rain came erosion. The Jeremiah household was teetering dangerously with most of its foundation washed out, Aami the silversmith had been hit by falling rock and broken her leg badly, Jir the apothecary had had their home smashed by the same. Large-scale projects were Julia’s specialty; she couldn’t leave.

Which is how she met Taako again.

She’d been hauling a cart—she needed lumber for the repairs and Magnus had taken the horse—when her load had lightened considerably. When she’d turned around to see if she’d dropped a slat or ten, her close and infuriating friend was sprawling lazily over her gently-levitating cart.

“Hey hey, Julie-Jule, guess who’s in town for the next couple weeks? I’m here to shadow you,” Taako said, stretching and relaxing bonelessly over the cart. That couldn’t be comfortable.

Julia dumped the cart over.

“Ah! Ow, ow, okay, okay okay—” Taako disappeared from under the distinctly non-floating wood and blinked back into existence behind Julia.

“I levitated the cart, Jules. Dumping a bunch of wood on me still hurts.” He made big, sad eyes at her that would be more convincing if his ears weren’t twitching nervously and his hands weren’t twisting on his wand and the hem of his blouse. Shit, she wished Magnus were here. Reassurance had never been her strong point.

Well, best to be honest. “I’m gonna kick your ass and give you the best hug of your damn life and then you’re gonna help me make repairs with magic.”

Taako glanced around nervously, but Julia grabbed his upper arm to haul him in for some goddamned eye contact.

“Actually, um, haha, you’re still mad about that? Now I think my fans are calling me I gotta—” His voice was at least an octave too high and he held out his hands in surrender. He looked seconds away from actively squirming, or maybe dropping his arm like a lizard would its tail and running away.

“I’m mad ‘cause you haven’t fuckin’ visited, dummy. No card, no ‘hey, I haven’t gotten myself killed with my shit personality and bullshit magic shenanigans,’ no Candlenights gifts, Magnus made you a duck for your birthday and you haven’t come by to pick it up! He made like a million ducks! I need to make a shed just to house all of his Taako-related angst ducks! All because you couldn’t be bothered to check in once in a while!” She poked him in the chest with each point, and he stared at her with each word like she was speaking Gnomish. Except he spoke a gazillion goddamned languages, so maybe he understood Gnomish. His big dumb ears were tilting independently of each other and he had her cart floating a foot off the ground.

Gods, but she’d missed this asshole.

She tugged Taako into a hug, ignoring how he jumped and stiffened at first. The cart hit the ground with a thud, startling both of them, but Taako leaned in.

He was not fantastic at hugs, so really all he did was lean into Julia while she hugged him, but that was pretty much how it went with Taako. He brought his hands up to give her an awkward squeeze and she let him go before he could hurt himself. He looked fantastically uncomfortable, but he had a little smile before he remembered that he hated and feared sincere displays of emotion.

“Yeah, yeah, adoring fans need their dose of Taako. Anyway, I’m here now! Ol’ Raven’s Roost gets a taste of the best show in Faerun, and Taako gets a celebrity vacation with his biggest fans. Speaking of which, what’s with the heavy lifting? Shouldn’t you be taking it easy in a big hero’s house?” He recast his levitation spell and sat on the cart’s yoke to watch Julia pick up the spilled lumber. Wizards. At least she wouldn’t have to haul the thing now.

“There’s been some erosion. Rainy season, it happens. I’m headed to the Jeremiah house to try to salvage it and get it braced for the next rainfall. You in?” It wasn’t difficult to tie a rope around the yoke of the cart—Taako blinked out of existence when she tied it around him—and secure it around her waist so if followed her as she walked up the hill.

“Ah, sure, I got time to kill. Jeremiah wasn’t the douchebag who yelled at me, was he? With the dumbass hat?” Julia didn’t look back at Taako, but she could feel his scorn.

Well, Jeremiah was a family name, and one of the Jeremiahs had in fact taken issue with Taako turning a bridge into feathers under a whole troop of Kalen’s soldiers, but. Taako didn’t need to know that.

“Nah. Jeremiah’s the one who thought you were cool. Big fan. You can turn wood into stone, right? Or metal?” There was very little that couldn’t be done by appealing to Taako’s ego.

Sure enough, Taako snorted. “Can, sure. That’s kid stuff. But if Taako’s makin’ a house, this is gonna be one bomb-ass house. Wood into stone, yeah, whatever, but this is gonna be some kickass stone. Fuckin’…emerald or some shit. Pink tourmaline! Nah, that’s a terrible idea. What’s your favorite rock?”

Julia grinned. She was gonna get the Jeremiahs a cool fucking house. “Bet you can’t make it out of diamond,” she challenged.

Taako sputtered. “What? Fuck you, I can make it out of anything. Not fuckin’ diamond, though, your house is gonna be fuckin’ see-through. You want everyone looking in while you’re taking a shit? Fuck no, I can do better than that. What, ebony? Onyx? Do you want a house made of fuckin’ gold? I’ll fuckin’ do it Jul-ia, just you say the word, you’ll have a useless-ass golden house on this hill, gonna be hell on your eyes on a sunny day. Is that what you want?”

Julia laughed. “I dunno, onyx sounded pretty good. You make jewelry with that, right? That’d be okay if you can’t do diamond.”

Taako tugged to rope tied to her. What a brat.

“Hey, homie, I can do diamond. Can do fuckin’ anything. You just throw some shit together; I’ll make it fuckin’ gorgeous.” He pouted audibly.

Julia pulled up next to the gently creaking house. “Well, at first you’ll just be keeping me company while I put some braces on this thing. We can do some magic once it’s not about to fall off the cliff, sound good?”

She started unloading the lumber and Taako shrugged fluidly without getting up. “I’m all for watching you do the work, Juju.”

“Good. Maybe while you’re here you can tell me why you were suck a little bitch to my fiancé before you left.” She’d caught him off-guard with that, and she almost felt bad, but he recovered quickly.

“Gee, you really know how to hit a guy, don’t you? Don’t worry about it. Just a couple things I had to do.” Taako watched closely as she hauled logs into piles, ready to prop what needed propping. Under his dramatic cloak, she could see he was tense, ready to run. She shot him a flat look.

“Don’t bullshit me, Taako. You killed a man and left. If I didn’t know better, I’d say you were trying to pick a fight. You trying to get us to hate you?” She resisted the urge to cross her arms and stare him down. He was skittish enough already.

Taako sighed dramatically before he slumped. Julia started organizing the wood by size and sturdiness around him. He took off his floppy hat and fiddled with it.

“I guess you deserve the truth. Maybe you can keep Mags off my back about it.” He didn’t look at her, but shifted easily to give her space to stack lumber.

“You’re damn right we deserve the truth. We’ve been waiting three months, Taako.” He settled for a moment with a hand on his shoulder, but he was getting tense under it and she moved back to the cart for another load. Best not look directly at him. Like a stray cat.

Taako sighed again, but it was quieter this time. Truer. He finally dared to look at her out of the corner of her eyes.

“Magnus…he really loves you, right? I mean, you know that, don’t you?” There was something inside his hat that he was messing with.

“He is marrying me, Taako. I think I got the idea,” Julia said. She sat down a little farther than was comfortable from her friend, but he glanced over at her like she was too close as it was so she didn’t push. “Why, do you…are you…?”

“What no no no, no, he’s like—he’s like a brother to me, I’m not, like—no. No, it’s…he _really_ loves you. A lot. Like, ballads, stuff of legend, fairy tale stuff. The kind of love that doesn’t exist in real life, right? He _loves_ you.” This close Julia saw a glint of metal, something jeweled and ornate before Taako put whatever he was fidgeting with back in his hat and held the whole bundle close to his chest. He gave her a guarded look.

Well. Taako’s experiences with love were deeply upsetting to hear about and she didn’t want to pry in case he set her on fire and ran away, but Magnus’s love for her was never something she’d doubted.

“Taako, where are you going with this? Magnus loves me so you decided to kill Kalen and be a dick about it?” She waited for him to glance away and shuffled a little bit closer. One of his ears flicked back to her but he didn’t acknowledge the move.

“Look, it’s really important for you to know. Magnus would do a lot of things for you. Incredible, awful, horrible things to keep you safe. That kind of love is—redeeming, fantastic, but Julia it’s dangerous. If someone hurt you—fuck, forget I said anything.” Taako curled around his hat and rubbed his temples. Julia gave him a pat that pitched him forward a bit. Whoops.

“You thought Kalen was gonna do something to me.” She guessed. Taako could be…vengeful, ruthless when he thought he needed to be. And Kalen was the type.

Taako gave a defeated nod. “Sure, sort of. That’s not why I did it, though. I just—I did what I had to. I’ve got people I’ve gotta…I’m gonna sound like Magnus here but there’s people I wanna keep safe, and Kalen had to die or he was gonna make a big mistake we’d all pay for.” Yeah, people to protect, Julia could relate. There was this one elf, for example… “But there’s—there’s some other stuff I’ve gotta do, for these people. Some of it’s not…good stuff. Gonna make killing Kalen look like a third-grade project. You guys gotta stop tagging after me, alright? You have a good thing going here, just—you love each other, you’re good at what you do, you’re happy. Just let me do my thing and you do yours.”

Julia rolled her eyes. “Taako, how old am I?”

Taako blinked at her. “Uh, like a hundred and forty? So, that would be, uh…twelve…sixteen…forty? Thirty?”

He squinted like her age would appear if he looked hard enough. Fuckin’ elves. She shook her head.

“Look, the point is that I’m a grown-assed woman, Taako. You wanna protect me, okay, whatever, but I can decide for myself if I need that, and I don’t. Magnus too. You think you’re on some edgy shit, fine. But we can decide ourselves whether it’s too much for us. And none of that means you can’t come by for Candlenights! We’re not asking to help you murder people! We just wanna get a damn postcard sometimes. Is that so hard?” She poked him in the chest, and he flinched away with his whole body but recovered, clutching his hat on his other side. He seemed to be just about at the end of his emotional honesty for the day, and really, Julia was running low on that, too. Time to wrap this up.

Probably thinking on a similar line, Taako straightened.

“I mean, it’s not—I’m not running around going murder time on _everybody_. But, I uh. Yeah, postcards? Postcards I could do. Just, like, sometimes. Not too often, don’t get your hopes up. But. Yeah. Postcards.” He ran out of momentum at the end there, but she’d gotten him to agree, and that was half the battle. She stretched out, cracking her neck in a way that she knew full well horrified him.

“Great! Glad you came around so nicely. Come on, let’s get this bad boy done.” She grinned, and Taako gave a hesitant smile back.

By the end of the afternoon, they had a bomb-ass mansion of obsidian with real gold trim on it which Taako claimed would be able to survive an invading army. Julia had her doubts about an army, but it did survive her taking an axe to it, so it would do. The next day would be Jir’s house, with more extensive damage and potentially some dangerous chemicals, but Julia was confident that the two of them could handle it. Hell, maybe Taako would even be around when Magnus came back and he could get a real apology in. She gave him a fist bump.

“You gonna have a show in town while you’re here? Gotta say I’ve never seen you cook before,” Julia said. Technically she’d seen him cook before, but he never let her or Magnus eat it. It didn’t count if you didn’t get to eat it.

Taako shook his head. “No fuckin’ way, dude. _If_ I have a show you’re not comin’. You got shit to do, gotta kill fuckin’ trees or whatever. No time for a cooking show.”

Julia punched his arm, but he disappeared before she could land it. “Hey, not fair. I’m opening my home to you and you’re gonna kick me out of your show? You should be cooking a goddamned spread for me.”

Taako reappeared safely out of reach on her other side. “Fuck no you’re not. I’ve got places to be.”

Julia rolled her eyes. This elf was gonna be the death of her.

“You got somewhere to sleep that doesn’t disappear when you stop summoning it?” She drawled.

Taako frowned. “There’s nothing wrong with how I meditate.”

She slung her arm over his shoulder to cut off his escape. He stiffened but didn’t try to run.

“Sure, when you’re in a war zone. We’ve got a guest room, Tic-tac. Fluffy pillows and all. ‘Sides, Dad’s been lonely without someone at home. Don’t you wanna see your son, too?” She tugged him, squirming, to her door.

“Don’t have a son, what are you—ah, leave the hair, I work fucking hard on that—hey, lemme go, Julia—” Taako sputtered as she brought him in, kicking the door open.

Immediately, Stephen II the Fish floated to its creator and tried to nibble on his hair. Taako glared at his creation.

“Traitor.” He pouted.

“Yeah, whatever. Stay the night and I won’t go to your show tomorrow. Deal?” Julia was already getting dishes out, she smelled supper on the stove. Her dad must have gotten it started early.

Taako sighed dramatically but started getting glasses for water. “Fine, whatever. If you’re that desperate for Taako time, I guess I can do a favor. Just tonight, though, capice? Don’t get used to it.”

Julia laughed. “No, no, of course not.”

He’d be staying until he left town, of course.

And he did come back every Candlenights.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This uh...I'm not saying it's going to get any more chapters but I do have some plans that involve at least the Here There Be Gerblins arc floating around. Like I don't want to say I'll write them because then it might take over my life like And I Will did, but...they're floating around in the old headspace. They exist. I cannot unmake them.
> 
> Save me.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stephen Waxman's funeral.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blame AmazingSuperiority for this one.

Julia’s father was dead.

It had been a peaceful passing, and they’d all had ample time to expect it, but…it didn’t take away the sting. He could have had years or even decades longer, but he’d gotten sick and no cleric had been able to heal him. None that they could afford.

The funeral was held quietly; he was laid to rest in an oak casket that she’d made herself. Magnus was by her side the whole time. People were devastated to hear that the father of one of the heroes of the rebellion had died.

And because it was a turbulent time, because he always seemed to show up just when things went bad, Taako was there.

“Sorry ‘bout your dad,” he muttered, approaching her at the end of the funeral. “Wish I coulda done something.”

She nodded. “Me too.”

Magnus squeezed his arm around her and sniffled. Taako shuffled.

“I, uh. This isn’t a good time for this, is it,” he mumbled. Julia glanced over at him. He was hugging himself and shifting on his feet, eyes darting like he wanted to run away.

“What’s up?” she asked. “Wait, wait a second. If you’re about to give me another goddamned casserole I’m kicking your ass right here and now, do you know how many of those things I’ve gotten in the last week? I don’t need that shit from you.”

Taako snorted. “Nah, you’re not getting a casserole. Just, had a favor to ask. It’s important.”

Huh. Taako didn’t usually admit that things were important to him.

“Is this really the time?” Magnus asked. “We’re standing on top of my father-in-law's  _fresh grave_ , Taako.”

Taako shrunk back further, ears parallel to the ground. “I know. I’m leaving. Got shit to do anyway. Just, this can’t wait. Hear me out for a sec and I’ll leave you alone.”

Julia nodded. “Shoot.”

Taako looked at her for a moment, then carefully constructed a sympathetic smile identical to every other citizen of Raven’s Roost for the past few days. Julia hated it.

“I don’t, uh, get. Death. I mean I know it’s, like, tough for you and that sucks, but, you know. Elf.” He gestured at himself. “I mean what I’m trying to say is that I don’t—I’m not trying to say I understand what you’re going through. Or—whatever. Just. I know it hurts? For you? To lose a parent?”

He was looking more lost by the second. Julia couldn’t decide whether or not he was being a little racist.

“Out with it, Taako, say what you’re saying,” she prompted.

“Right. Yeah. Don’t go adventuring.” He nodded to himself. “Like, you’re grieving and whatever, great. I mean, not great, but you know. Do not leave Raven’s Roost. Grieve right here at home with your successful business and your peaceful future.”

Julia felt Magnus stiffen. To be fair, she was pretty alarmed, too.

“How the hell did you know about that?” he asked. “We haven’t told anyone yet!”

Taako shifted and glanced around cagily. “Intuition. Listen, don’t do it, okay? It’s not a good idea, say no to homeless drifting.”

Julia nodded. “Okay, if you say so. I trust you, Taako.”

Magnus sent her a quizzical look and she smiled blandly at him. He furrowed his brow but nodded.

“I mean, if you don’t want to go anymore, okay,” he said. “I’m happy to be wherever you are.”

Taako nodded decisively. “Good. That’s good. No adventuring. Best not to travel too far from Raven’s Roost at all, really. And for the love of the Gods don’t go to Phandalin.”

Julia nodded. “No Phandalin. Got it.”

“Well, I guess I can go now. Just had to tell you that. I gotta check up on this shitty cleric I know, old man’s gonna run off and get himself killed one day,” Taako groused. “Been nice seeing you. Sorry for your, uh, loss. And all.”

And with a wave of his wand he disappeared.

Magnus turned to Julia.

“You changed your mind awfully quick,” he said. She rolled her eyes.

“That’s because I didn’t. Look, I don’t know what the _fuck_ Taako is hiding from us, or if he even is hiding anything, but I can’t stay here anymore. He doesn’t like it, tough. He can deal.” She turned away from her father’s grave. She didn’t want to stand here anymore.

“If that’s what you wanna do, Jules, I’m right behind you,” Magnus promised. “I love you.”

“I love you too, babe.” She stopped for a quick kiss. “Let’s get this show on the road.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think the time may have come...I may have to admit that this is not complete as it is...it needs...More.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things get serious in Wave Echo Cave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright,,,,,,,,, here it is,,, my last chapter i can get away with calling it complete as is,,,,,,,, if i update again i have to admit it's a wip and i will die, instantly

Gundren, fiery and maybe a little possessed, said, “I’m done with this. It’s payback time.”

Which, that didn’t, it didn’t look great for Julia, or Killian, or anyone anywhere, actually, because he was glowing and being pretty damned racist and apparently this glove thing was like, big shit or something, maybe. Gundren was already moving out of the vault, into the room with the door, and Julia’s party and Killian rushed to follow him.

They arrived just in time to see him hit a silvery barrier and fall down.

“You wanna maybe put that down before you hurt someone?” Taako asked, and hand on his want and another behind his back.

“Taako?” Magnus asked, behind Julia. “When did you get here?”

Killian glanced at them, crossbow aimed between Taako and Gundren. “You know this guy? He with you?”

“Hey, I told you not to go fucking adventuring, didn’t I? Didn’t I tell you? And now who’s totally, completely right, about everything. As always. It’s Taako,” Taako said, not taking his eyes off Gundren, who seemed a little stunned. Honestly, Julia hadn’t expected anything to be able to stop him once he caught fire, either.

“Hey, you never said that,” Merle, their new-ish companion, protested, and Taako huffed.

“Not you, you’re good, whatever. Those two have other things they can do, though,” he said. “Which they should be _getting back to_ before they run out of chances!”

Gundren finally picked himself up off the floor, eyes still glowing like coal. “And what the hell are you supposed to be?”

Taako grinned, knifelike, and Julia felt a lot better about their chances of stopping the crazy fire dwarf, now. No one had seen that look directed at them and survived.

“I’m stopping you from making dumbass decisions and killing a lot of folks, is what I am. You wanna put that glove down and give it to the nice lady?” He gestured with his head at their party, unspecifically.

“I’m not taking that thing,” Julia said. “It burned Magnus as soon as he touched it, no way!”

“No, Killian. We’re giving it to Killian,” Taako said, which, he should have mentioned knowing Killian earlier if she was gonna be his plan for this shit.

Killian didn’t seem to know him, though.

“What the fuck, guy, I can’t take that, I’d kill like, a lot of people,” she said, though she shifted the crossbow more towards Gundren. That was a good thing, at least.

Taako scowled. “Well I can’t touch it, and Julia can’t touch it, and Magnus can’t touch it, who the hell’s gonna get it to kssssssh? Gonna get Barry fuckin’ Bluejeans up in here?”

“Actually, Barry’s dead,” Magnus volunteered.

“Oh, already?” Taako asked. Come to think of it, how long had he been following them? “Ah, well. Can’t win ‘em all.”

“I can grab the glove thing,” Merle said.

Gundren snarled. “Off of my dead body, sure!”

Taako shrugged, the picture of indifference. “Kinda the plan if you don’t calm the fuck down, my guy. You wanna go to the time-out corner?”

He wiggled his fingers, but nothing happened. He didn’t seem phased.

Gundren wasn’t paying attention, anyway. “What the hell did you do to the door?” he demanded.

Actually, that was a good question. It didn’t seem like any kind of magic Julia knew, too solid to be purely made of magic. Probably. It wasn’t a ranger thing, at least.

Actually, Taako still hadn’t taken his hand out from behind him. Maybe that was where he was casting whatever it was? Some sort of transmutation, maybe? They needed a real mage around to look into this shit, insanely powerful magic artifacts and weird spells that can stop them weren’t Julia’s bag.

Taako, for his part, just shrugged. “I’m not gonna let you kill a whole bunch of people. Taako ain’t about that life.”

Said the murderer, war criminal, revolutionary. Hell, though, Julia was two for three of those, too, didn’t stop her from being a good goddamned person.

“Yeah!” Merle said. “You need to stop being so orcist!”

Magnus looked puzzled. “Is it really called that? Isn’t it just fantasy racist? I mean—”

Gundren lost his patience.

“I don’t care what it is!” he shouted, flaring to life again and hitting the barrier like a battering ram. Taako, taken by surprise, buckled at the same time as his wall did with a grunt of effort.

Julia knew better than to crowd him, but Magnus could never resist a friend in pain. He made it halfway to Taako while Taako scrambled backwards until he scrambled right into something on the wall.

Taako yelped at a decibel not achievable by most races, jumping a foot in the air with a flash of something metallic before he found his feet, standing over…something red? Something they’d missed on their way in.

At a second glance, though, Taako dismissed it. “Sorry ‘bout that. Meant to kill ‘im in here, I’d better get going before the kssssssh gets too bad.”

“Wait, you can make the static, too?” Julia asked. She’d thought it was just Killian and the funny drow, but…maybe she, Magnus, and Merle were the weird ones, not being able to hear it properly?

“That’s something I would like to know, too,” said Killian, crossbow pointed directly at Taako’s chest and finger on the trigger.

Taako looked at her, at the door, at the distance between them. No easy escape.

“Fuck,” he said.

Julia began creeping towards Killian. Slow and steady. Easy, easy movements.

The flutter of fear, seeing her friend pinned down in the open, did not make it easy.

“How the fuck do you know about the kssssh? And how the _fuck_ did you stop one of them?” Killian demanded, striding closer. Fuck fuck fuck. Wizards weren’t meant for close quarters. Julia changed course.

“Uh, hmm, well, you see, uh, Killian, buddy,” Taako’s eyes darted around frantically and he backed further against the wall with a crunch. He glanced down and Julia winced preemptively. A moment’s distraction was a death sentence.

Not so for Taako, though, apparently. His eyes lit up.

“Sorry, miss umbrella!” he said, diving down to the red form at his feet. “Fuck yeah, distraction!”

With a crack, the cave was filled with glorious, terrifying fire. Julia’s vision went white, and then black, faded with spurts of color, and she could hear her companions fumbling as they were blinded, too.

“Fucking finally! How long have I been asleep? Feels like forever!” a woman exclaimed, and Julia squinted at a blur of red just a little higher up than most people should be tall. She blinked rapidly, trying to clear her vision up and make sense of it.

“Fuck!” growled Killian. “Fuck fuck—okay, I don’t know what the hell to do with you guys, but you’re gonna wanna get behind me if you want to live. We gotta leave this cave.”

She sounded as close to genuine fear as Julia had heard her yet, and she’d been unarmed and about to die about an hour ago. Good sign or bad?

The red got closer, and Julia could make out a vague, floating figure that bent down in front of her.

“Hey, who is this? Hey, hey, who’s this lovely lady? I see a wedding ring!” the red blur said. “Jeez, how much have I _missed_? It’s good to meet you!”

Julia felt Magnus’s familiar hand on her shoulder and let him bully her behind him, just while she got her vision back. His eyes were better than hers.

“Who are you?” he demanded of the figure.

She stood(?) up, moved half a step back, and Julia’s clearing vision showed her a tilted, ethereal head in a floating red robe.

“Holy shit,” she whispered before she could stop herself.

“What?” the—ghost?—asked.

“Who _are_ you and what do you want with my _wife_?” Magnus said. Julia tapped him on the back of the bicep to indicate she was back in action and stood beside him.

The phantasm’s face flickered, joy turning in an instant to distress, confusion.

“I—this isn’t funny,” she said.

Killian tugged on the back of Julia and Magnus’s shirts. “Right now, time to go, we gotta stop that dwarf, we gotta leave before it gets violent—”

Too late, it looked like. The spirit glanced to the right, at the open vault door, and did a double-take.

“You—you opened it back up? You opened the damn vault? I died getting this shut!” she protested, flying to the doorway and back to the retreating party. “Why’d you let someone get kssssssh? They’re gonna kill someone! We have to stop them!”

Killian picked up the pace and Julia picked up Merle so he could follow, and soon they were racing down a trail of destruction, stopping only briefly to free a teenager from a cage and continuing to run.

As they arrived in Phandalin, they found a ghost town. The only sound at all came from Taako, stuttering his way through…probably his best-ever attempt at comfort, actually.

“—and you don’t, wanna, um, you, you don’t wanna blow up this town. You wanna—you—you’ve got, got a, home? Here? And your family?” Taako stumbled, hands held out peacefully, one empty and one with his wand and something metallic.

The phantasm made an inhuman gasp, or a sigh, and stopped where she was for a moment, watching.

Julia didn’t have time for that.

“My family is dead!” Gundren said. “And it’s all because of those damned—orcs!”

Taako took half a step back, caught himself, and forged on. “I, um, that sucks, yeah, um—”

Julia placed Merle in Gundren’s line of sight and scampered out of it herself. She could hear him beginning to soothe as she turned back to the ghost. Clerics were good for that shit.

“Oh thank fuck,” Taako sighed, slumping.

“Yeah, not bad on the stall, yourself,” Julia grinned, nudging him on the shoulder. He looked up at her, startled as ever by physical interaction, but returned a tiny, fragile smile like a dare.

“Just like old times,” Magnus said, clapping them both on the back and sending Taako stumbling.

“Yeah, one last time. I’m serious, though, you guys shouldn’t—”

The ghost had recovered from her brief moment of—emotion? Of some sort? She phased right through Magnus and reached for Taako.

“Babe, Taako, I’m back! I’m back, baby!” she cheered, and the brief camaraderie disappeared entirely from Taako’s face. He took three quick steps back, reestablishing his personal bubble.

He narrowed his eyes, studying the spirit.

“You’re not like the other one,” he murmured. “Guess I never stuck around long enough to see…”

The ghost moved closer, and Taako’s ears snapped back as he glared defensively, matching her, step for…float.

“Taako, it’s me,” she said. “It’s—it’s Lup. What are you talking about? It’s _me_.”

Taako gestured for Julia and Magnus to get back as the ghost lost her face in favor of a skull in a robe. Julia was only too happy to stand next to him, ready if the spirit tried anything. All she knew about the thing was that she’d apparently died sealing away the gauntlet, which, great, and that she thought she knew Taako, which was scaring the bejeezus out of him.

Magnus got their wizard behind his shield, and she flanked them, ready to provide ranged support or run in as required.

Before she could decide, though, there was the familiar _shhf-thunk_ of an arrow flying true, and the unique feeling of impending doom. Taako cursed and clapped both hands to whatever he was holding, and—

“It’s—it’s Lup. What are you talking about? It’s—Taako, what did you do?” The ghost was back a couple of feet, they were all out of formation again, and Taako wasn’t paying attention. He whipped around, holding that shining _something_ close to his chest and closing his eyes tight as he concentrated.

Well, Julia knew what to do with a concentrating wizard. She got between him and the most pressing threat, and Magnus slotted into place on his other side.

_Shhf-thunk_ and then silence, broken only by a tiny sound in the back of Taako’s throat as whatever he was casting struggled against him.

“Taako, you’re not,” the ghost floated forward and Julia readied a handaxe, for all the good it would do against an incorporeal spirit.

She—Lup, if that was her real name—hesitated. Just long enough. Taako slumped and let out a hard breath as his spell finished.

“Holy fuck,” whispered Magnus. Julia wanted to see what was up, but Lup was too close for comfort—but Lup moved past her, so she could check out the situation and guard their glass cannon at the same time.

A small, perfect circle of obsidian was on the ground, inches from Merle, where Gundren had been standing.

“You bubbled my cousin!” accused Merle.

Taako, still panting slightly, shook himself. “Yeah, well—”

_Shhf-thunk_ , and Taako jerked as Killian’s arrow flew true, a moment’s inattention costing him dearly. He staggered, and Julia whipped around to face her new enemy.

“Look, I’m sorry,” started Killian, but Julia wasn’t gonna hear it. She hefted her handaxe—

“—bubbled my cousin!”

Taako dove to the right, and Julia, on instinct, whipped around. Déjà vu, Killian was standing with her crossbow at the ready.

Lup faced her with them, hands lighting up with fire. “You’re gonna pay for that,” she said.

“He’s a kssssh! He’s already ksssh!” Killian said, before being surrounded by silvery _something_ in a perfect sphere.

Taako, hunched somewhat but on his feet, pointed at Merle.

“You. Pick up the gauntlet. You can resist the kssssh.” His voice crackled out and he scowled at their blank expressions. “Just do it, this has been the day from actual _hell_ and I am not waiting around for it to get worse.”

Magnus moved to support him, hands out, but Taako backed out of reach.

“I’m not gonna go all crazy fire dwarf! No way!” Merle shook his head, backing away from the glove.

Hey, actually, now that she looked at it…

“Fucking now, get it in your bag, Merle!” Taako demanded, and Merle jolted into action a split second before she did, and she lunged for it, and then, why was she lunging so hard for it? It was just a glove, and a pretty damned evil one at that. Why had she even wanted to touch it?

She looked at the bag containing the thing doubtfully.

“Not your fault,” Lup said. “It’s the ksssssh. Happens to everyone.”

“I think someone’d better explain all the static now,” Julia said. She turned to face their expert in all things inexplicable.

Taako scowled and dug his toe in the dirt.

She smiled. “Now.”

Taako drooped.

“You really shouldn’t get involved in all this, Julia,” he said. She could barely hear him, but she knew better than to get too close.

“Taako, what the hell is going on? Why are you—using ksssh and acting all weird and—are you mad at me for leaving? Just tell me,” Lup said, floating to him, and he disappeared with a snap.

“Fuck, now we’ll never get it explained,” Magnus groaned.

“He’s right there,” said Merle, and yeah, actually, there he was, standing behind Julia.

“I’ll tell you what I can. Tell me if you can’t hear what I’m saying. You, lich, ten-foot distance, minimum. I don’t fucking know what your voice is doing to me and I don’t like it,” he said, sitting cross-legged. “Once I’m done, go _home_. There is _nothing_ for you here.”

“I’m not—” Lup—the lich? Julia needed to look up liches when she got a second—started, and cut herself off, drifting backwards and approximating a sitting position. “Okay. If that’s what you need to feel safe.”

Taako snarled. “I’m not some wounded little—I don’t need _shit_ from you,” he insisted.

“Taako,” Julia reminded him, tugging Magnus to a sitting position a good distance away from Taako and patting the ground next to her for Merle.

Taako sighed, looked at the bubble that presumably still held Killian.

“Will she be okay?” Magnus asked, seeing where his attention was.

“Yeah,” Taako said. “Killian’s tough, got a girlfriend who loves her, friends, whatever the fuck. This’ll just be, you know, brief trauma. Prob’ly the least trouble anyone’s had out of a ksssh in a long time.”

“Why’s there the static, though? Is it a curse on us, or you, or—?” Julia prompted, and Taako looked longingly at the ground.

“Killian’s got a secret club,” he said. “And they—find stuff, like that—” he gestured to Merle and the bag containing the gauntlet— “and they get it so it can’t hurt anyone. Doesn’t always work, but uh, they’ve stopped the end of all life on the planet once or twice. These things are—bad. When they get into the wrong hands.”

“Like, Merle’s cousin just died bad, or like, a whole city bad?” Magnus asked, and Taako shrugged, shifting uncomfortably.

“There’s—I mean, this one’s not so bad. Straight damage. It woulda leveled everything within a mile and stopped there.” He gestured like it wasn’t a big deal, but the miserable set of his shoulders and the persistent droop of his ears didn’t hide anything.

“And that’s the good part?” Julia asked, and instantly regretted it. It could always get worse.

Taako obliged.

“The transmutation one—it’s, a—well, you won’t hear me anyway. It doesn’t look like much, but someone almost turned the whole world into pink tourmaline with it once. There’s another, it can also kinda destroy the world, but in a different way, I guess, just—the power of the ksssh depends on the will of the person using it.” Taako met her eyes, briefly, and turned to stare at Magnus. “If the person wielding it wants it badly enough, the end of the world is small fry.”

“We were doing the best we could,” Lup said in a small voice. “We thought it was the right thing to do.”

Taako snorted. “Well, I dunno what the fuck your alternative was, but maybe explore that one next time,” he said acerbically.

Lup looked at him, illusory eyes narrowing in thought, concentration.

“You really don’t know me,” she said. “Did you, what, hit your head at some point? Get cursed? Why are you getting involved at all?”

Taako watched her with deep suspicion before tossing his head.

“I’ve been involved,” he said. “I’m in too deep to get out of it now. Julia, Magnus, Merle, you’re not. You can turn around right now and go home. Take other jobs. Pretend this never happened. The—Killian’s secret club will take care of these things. I’ll be keepin’ an eye out, anyhow, keep anyone else from getting too fucked up. There’s no need for you to ever hear about these things again.”

He stared at her, imploring, fidgeting at the prolonged eye contact but not looking away. She met him head on.

“I’ll do whatever you do, babe,” Magnus said, and Lup cooed, “Aren’t you proud, Taako? He’s all grown up!”

Beside her, Merle shrugged. “Hasn’t been too bad following you kids around, don’t see how it can hurt to do that a while longer.”

Magnus patted her shoulder. “Comes down to you, Jules. What do you think?”

That was…a lot. Of pressure. Right there. On her.

But she’d lead a revolution that risked every part of her home and life, and she knew how to handle a burden.

“Let me tell you what I’m hearing here, and you can tell me if I’m wrong,” she said. Taako blinked slowly.

“Sure.”

“So there are other things like that glove, things that can do terrible things,” she started. Taako nodded. “And there’s an organization that stops them from doing those things, which Killian works for.”

He didn’t protest, worrying at something he was holding in his lap. “Got it so far.”

“And you don’t want us to follow her there, because…they’ve got it covered? You’ve got it covered? It’s too dangerous? What?” she asked, and Taako broke eye contact to look cagey and glance all around, at anything but her. Residents of Phandalin were beginning to peek out of their homes and businesses.

“It’s—these ksssh—I don’t—look, just, I’d rather you didn’t. Okay? Do you—do you remember that time, when I came back, after Kalen, and I talked to you about—about love?” He repositions to his knees, back to cross-legged, fidgeting all the while, refusing to look at any of them.

“When you sounded absolutely like a paranoid whackjob terrified by the concept of feelings?” Julia asked.

Taako did crack a ghost of a smile at that one.

“Hey, if the shoe fits,” he said. “Just—I—there isn’t an easy way to say this.”

“I find spitting it out works pretty well,” said Magnus, and well, you can’t fault him for sense.

Taako sighed. “I was afraid of that. Well, fine. Out with it an onwards, I guess.”

He stood up, brushing street-dirt off his knees and straightening the flow of his loose shirt-dress-thing with one hand, while the other retreats inside his sleeve.

“There’s two ways we go from here. You leave Killian the glove, keep it wrapped up tight so it can’t hurt her, never have anything to do with her organization or the ksssh again. Life continues as normal. Or.” Taako paused, closed his eyes for a moment. Bracing against what he was about to say.

And then he opened his eyes, and they were steely and cold as they’d ever been during the rebellion.

“Or you go with Killian. You join the ksssh. You get your answers. And the next time I see you, I will kill you.”

And then he was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :3

**Author's Note:**

> This was fun to write and it's been stuck in my head FOREVER. I hope you liked it! I have a couple other Adventure Zone AU's I might do, but I'm not sure what I'll do next, if anything. Let me know what you think and hit me up on my [tumblr](hahanoiwont.tumblr.com)


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